one door closes and another door opens, you are
I say, The other day, I could be
referring to any time
yesterday and 15 years ago.
remember being able to get up without making
had my patience tested. I'm negative.
When you lose a sock in the dryer, it comes
as a Tupperware lid that doesn't fit any of your
you're sitting in public and a stranger takes
the seat next
you, just stare straight ahead and say Did
you bring the
you ask me what I am doing today, and I
say nothing, it
not mean I am free. It means I am doing nothing.
60 might be the new 40, but 9:00 is new
finally got eight hours of sleep. It took me
three days, but
hate when a couple argues in public, and I
and don't know whose side I'm on.
someone asks what I did over the weekend, I
Why, what did you hear?
you do squats, are your knees supposed to sound
chewing on an aluminum can stuffed with celery?
I ask for directions, please don't use words
bother walking a mile in my shoes. That would be
30 seconds in my head. That'll freak you right
someone unexpected comes into your life out
your heart race, and changes you forever. We
older I get, the earlier it gets late.
luck is like a bald guy who just won a comb