SIGNS-lots-of-new-ones.txt

 A SIGN IN A SHOE REPAIR STORE IN VANCOUVER THAT READ:
 We will heel you
 We will save your sole
 We will even dye for you.

 A Sign over a Gynaecologist's Office:
 "Dr. Smith, at your cervix.";

 A Sign In a Podiatrist's office:
 "Time wounds all heels.";

 A Sign On a Septic Tank Truck:
 Yesterday's Meals on Wheels;

 A Sign At an Optometrist's Office:
 "If you don't see what you're looking for, You've come to the right place.";

 A Sign On a Plumber's truck :
 "We repair what your husband fixed.";

 A Sign On another Plumber's truck:
 "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.";

 A Sign At a Tyre Shop in Milwaukee :
 "Invite us to your next blowout.";

 A Sign On an Electrician's truck:
 "Let us remove your shorts.";

 A Sign In a Non-smoking Area:
 "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate
 action.";

 A Sign On a Maternity Room door:
 "Push. Push. Push.";

 A Sign At a Car Dealership:
 "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.";

 A Sign Outside a Muffler Shop:
 "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.";

 A Sign In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
 "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!";

 A Sign At the Electric Company:
 "We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time.
 However, if you don't, YOU will be de-lighted.";

 A Sign In a Restaurant window:
 "Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.";

 A Sign In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
 "Drive carefully. We'll wait.";

 A Sign At a Propane Filling Station:
 "Thank Heaven for little grills.";

 A Sign In a Chicago Radiator Shop:
 "Best place in town to take a leak.";

 And the best one for last.;
 Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:
 "Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises"
 
---  David Woodsmall -  http://www.woodsmall.com/
     Copyright 2015-2020 by David R. Woodsmall