Subject: QUICKIES

 

I dialed a number and got the following recording:  "I am not available right now, but  Thank you for caring enough to call.    I am making some changes in my life.    Please leave a message after the    Beep. If I do not return your call,    You are one of the changes."             ###########  Man comes home, finds his wife with his friend in bed.     He shoots his friend and kills him.  Wife says "If you behave like this, you will lose ALL your friends!"              ########## Aspire to inspire before you expire.             ######## My wife and I had words,    But I didn't get to use mine.                                       ########## Frustration is trying to find your glasses without your glasses.             ########## The irony of life is that, by the time    You're old enough to know your way  around,  you're not going anywhere.                        ##########    God made man before woman so as to give him time     to think of an answer for her first question.                        ##########  I was always taught to respect my elders,    But it keeps getting harder to find one.                           ##########

  

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A young boy asks his Dad, "What is the difference between confident and confidential?"   
Dad says, "You are my son, I'm confident about that. 
Your friend over there, is also my son, that's confidential." 
  
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  A women asks man who is traveling with six children, 
"Are all these kids yours?" 
The man replies, "No, I work in a condom factory and these 
are customer complaints".


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